self care

On Being Unafraid... Monday Mojo + Magic

To me, being unafraid or fearless doesn't equal not feeling scared or not feeling fear, it just means feeling the fear and doing it anyway (as Susan Jeffers said in her most famous quote).  Taking a chance, daring to dream, choosing a new path.... these are scary things!

To me, being unafraid also means being okay with feeling uncomfortable. Sometimes the best changes and progress come when you're in the midst of an uncomfortable situation. Getting of your comfort zone can precipitate unexpected transformations and surprises.

At my school, the teachers are always being told to 'Get comfortable with being uncomfortable', because this is the best way for us to innovate, create, and learn new things.

Sometimes the hardest thing to do is take a forward step, no matter how small. Taking that step (even whilst being fearful) is letting fear and being unafraid exist together (yes, I think this is possible) as a propellant. 'Fortune favours the bold' as they say!

It's also scary to really 'feel' your feelings, especially the all encompassing ones, and let them flow through you, rather than control you.

I'm much less afraid now than I used to be of sitting with my feelings and letting them wash over and through me. I know they can't hurt me.... only the way I respond to them can. (A great counselor taught me this at a time of emotional turmoil - thank you Pat.)

I feel myself becoming the fearless person I have dreamt of being... Janelle Monae. Circleo of Daydreams. www.circleofdaydreams.com

How about being unafraid to love yourself unconditionally and accept yourself wholly?

Being unafraid to be the real you, and let others 'see' you too?

Being unafraid to say 'no' and hold firm to your boundaries when your self respect and self care demand/deserve it?

Being unafraid to make a mistake and look silly or stupid because you know you really want to try something.

Many people find some or all of these things challenging. People who grew up being people pleasers (like myself),  and wanting to be liked by everyone (to the detriment of themselves), struggle with being more unafraid. We're too frightened of upsetting other people and losing the things we've placed importance on.

Learning to work on my 'unafraidness' has helped me feel happier and more at peace these last 10 years or so. Practising mindfulness, gratitude, and learning the art of 'letting go' have all played a part in my development. Recording and noticing things to be thankful for has led to a new feeling of satisfaction that's not dependent on external validation.

Using things like the 'Serenity Prayer' and 'The Four Agreements' has given me a new perspective about my place in this world, and how to flourish within it.

If you're interested in practicing gratitude in a mindful way, I've created some pages called 'Witness Your Week'. (Click here to get them.)

Building a written gratitude ritual over time has been proven to lead to greater happiness and joy, and a better sense of contentment. I'm more willing to try new things and take risks, because I have a long list of things to be grateful for that aren't dependent on the outcome. 

As Buddha once said:


“Let us rise up and be thankful, because if we didn’t learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn’t learn a little, at least we didn’t get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn’t die; so, let us all be thankful.”

(Buddha)


Your dreams, your feelings, your opportunities, your wants, your needs, your talents, your abilities, your worthiness, your inner child, your inner adult, your past, your present, your future.... all these can give us cause for fear (even when they're exciting and good).

Being unafraid is about realising this is okay!

I keep saying the same thing: it's not about being fearless but really just embracing the fears and using them. Kristen Stewart. Circle of Daydreams. www.circleofdaydreams.com

Feeling fear is normal.

Being unafraid to feel the fear and continue anyway (as appropriate), is something I continue to work on so I can facilitate forward movement in situations I think offer hope, potential or opportunity for my personal growth!

How about you?

Are you able to 'feel the fear and do it anyway?'

Is fear itself something that scares you?

Do you have any tips or strategies to help you through whatever fear it is you may be facing?

Happy Monday, Daydreamer.

May your mojo and magic be with you this week as you step forward no matter your fears.

Linda. xox


The best way out is always through.

(Robert Frost)




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Thoughtful Way-finding + The Garden of Gratitude...


Once or twice a month, I send out small yet mighty notes of encouragement and support. These emails include way-finding directions, cheer-leading, and ideas to make your journey better one step, one fork in the road, and one magical moment at a time. Free access to The Garden of Gratitude is also yours as soon as you subscribe.

CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE



Dearest Daydreamer - What Haven't You Done Lately?

The greatest gift you can give yourself is a little bit of your own attention. Anthony J D'Angelo. Circle of Daydreams. www.circleofdaydreams.com

My Dearest Daydreamer,

It's been a little while!

I'm checking in to see how you are....

When was the last time you gave yourself the luxury of doing something special just for you?

Simply because you wanted to?

Because you love it?

And, did you do it with no guilt? Without feeling selfish and terrible for treating yourself with so much importance?

If there's one thing I've learned over time, it's that taking care of myself as if I'm a seriously important person is paramount to experiencing life to the fullest, as well as connecting with others in the most fulfilling way.

I don't mean turning into a narcissistic egomaniac who's unaware of others' feelings and lacking in compassion for anyone else... that wouldn't encourage any type of meaningful relationships. I believe kindness, empathy, and general decency are the touchstones of any life well-lived.

Love yourself first, and everything else falls into line. Lucille Ball. Circle of Daydreams. www.circleofdaydreams.com

But, after 50+ years on this amazing planet, and many tutorials by the 'Universe' in the form of life lessons, I've come to realize that self-care, self-nurturing, and self-love, allow me to sculpt and maintain the best version of myself.

And, creating and growing the 'best' version of myself not only has benefits for me, but for everyone in my life. If I show up for others fully present, feeling centered and at ease, happy in my own skin; then I'm giving them more than I'm capable of if I'm run-down, tired, and worn out from trying to do too much.

Taking time-out for myself reaps so many rewards.

No woman can control her destiny if she doesn't give to herself as much as she gives of herself. Suze Orman. Circle of Daydreama. www.circleofdaydreams.com

So, what is it you love to do that you haven't done lately?

What can you do that will nurture your soul, soothe your worries, inspire your mind, open your heart, and just make you feel darn good?

I'm talking about really simple things.....

  • Taking time out to sit at the beach, watch the waves roll in, and wriggle your toes in the sand
  • Spending half an hour sitting in the sun with a favourite magazine and a cup of tea
  • Snuggling in bed for an extra hour with a good book and nowhere else to be
  • Buying a bunch of beautiful flowers to bloom in your home
  • Taking yourself off to the cinema to catch a fabulous movie
  • Indulging in a long, hot bath with your favourite bubbles and a candle
  • Spending time writing in your journal or creating something
  • Getting a manicure, a pedicure or a massage
  • Giving yourself a facial, including a face scrub, a mask, and a moisturizing treatment
  • Cooking your favourite meal or baking your favourite cake and savouring the taste
  • Sitting quietly with your pet and giving it a cuddle or a pat
  • Walking through a beautiful park or amongst some wonderful trees

Time spent doing simple things you love can rejuvenate your mind, body and soul; and give you the opportunity to replenish your inner well or 'life-force'.

The next time you're running around doing things for everyone else, stop for a moment, and plan to do something for yourself.

You deserve it - totally - and so do your 'significant others'.

Putting yourself first when it comes to self-care and nourishment leads to a win-win situation for everyone. YOU get to feel happier and healthier, and your nearest and dearest get the best YOU possible.

If you'd like more ideas for looking after yourself and sculpting the best version of 'YOU', you can subscribe to my monthly printables showcase here. Beautiful inspiration for you to download and use anywhere you like!

Linda. xox

PS. I'd love you to share the simple ways you put yourself first. How do you take time out to nurture your heart and soul?



Please share!






Thoughtful Way-finding + The Garden of Gratitude...


Once or twice a month, I send out small yet mighty notes of encouragement and support. These emails include way-finding directions, cheer-leading, and ideas to make your journey better one step, one fork in the road, and one magical moment at a time. Free access to The Garden of Gratitude is also yours as soon as you subscribe.

CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE



Who and What Really Matters? [Monday Mojo & Magic]


'Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most.'
(Buddha)

This Monday morning, I'm thinking about who and what really matters in my life....

Who and What Really Matters? Circle of Daydreams. www.circleofdaydreams.com

My Mum, who was just starting to feel a glimmer of her old self again after triple bypass heart surgery late last year, had a fall a few weeks ago.

She fractured several ribs and crushed a vertebrae in her back, and spent 3 weeks or so in hospital. She's just come home (literally 30 seconds around the corner from me) and is still shaky and frail. I love her so, and it sobers me to realize at 87 years of age, this woman who has always been so energetic and full of life for her age, is starting to really slow down and is in pain much of the time.

Then, earlier this week, a dear friend received the news that her own mother, the same age as my Mum, is suffering from a nasty form of cancer.

It's reminded me how short life is.

Yes, 87 years is a long time, but the years seem to fly more quickly the older I get, and time now seems measured in moments more than it ever has. If perchance I were blessed to live as long as my Mum has so far, it still means much more of my life has passed than I have left.

Of late, life has also seemed to grow exponentially stressful, overwhelming, and demanding.

Small things pile on top of bigger things, on top of even bigger things, and the load seems extreme.

Time for me to once again take stock.

Breathe.

Step back and consider from a calm perspective.

To let go of the people, activities and tasks making the important moments seemingly part of an ever muttering and mumbling crowd clamoring for my attention.

Time to re-focus on my gratitude practice, and prioritize the things, and more importantly the people, that add true meaning to my life.

I know if I don't care for myself first, then others in my life get a paler version of me, and I fail to give myself the compassion and kindness I deserve as much as anyone.

I want the best me to show up for the time I spend with my loved ones.

I want the best me to stand in the classroom when I'm teaching.

This Monday morning, may you return to what and who really matter (including yourself)...

... and may your mojo be with you, and your inner magic shine through once again.

Linda. xox

PS. I'm adding this blog post to Open Slather and Denyse Whelan's link up this cold and chilly Monday!

PPS. Also linking up with Micro Blog Mondays!




Please share!






Thoughtful Way-finding + The Garden of Gratitude...


Once or twice a month, I send out small yet mighty notes of encouragement and support. These emails include way-finding directions, cheer-leading, and ideas to make your journey better one step, one fork in the road, and one magical moment at a time. Free access to The Garden of Gratitude is also yours as soon as you subscribe.

CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE