sleep

YOU Matter - A Five Day Expose`Of Your Significance (Part 4) Are You Taking Care Of These Fundamentals?

Welcome to Part 4 of YOU Matter!

You can find all three previous parts by clicking the links below.

YOU Matter - Part 1
YOU Matter - Part 2
YOU Matter - Part 3

Now, on with today's musings....

If YOU mattered, then you'd be treating yourself well.

Right?

If you can make a difference in the lives of others (as we spoke about in Day Two), then tending to your own health and well-being is a protective shield for all the value you bring to the world.

Allowing yourself to wither or shrivel from self neglect, is like robbing the world and the lives of others of your best self.

This begs the question...

Are you providing sustenance for your mental, emotional, spiritual and physical needs?

For me, there are a basic set of self care tasks and requirements I need to focus on to get the best from myself.

These are: good food, movement, sleep (a HUGE one for me), drinking lots of water, connecting with friends and family, showing gratitude, and being mindful as often as I can.

I find if I focus on doing my best and maintaining regular routines in all these areas, my life is significantly easier and more energetic than if I don't!

Let's take a closer look at some of these, shall we!


“Self-care is never a selfish act - it is simply good stewardship of the only gift I have, the gift I was put on Earth to offer others. ”
(Parker Palmer)

Are You Cultivating an Attitude of Thanks?

Gratitude is such an easy and simple way to start feeling better about what you have in your life. It's an expression of appreciation for all that is good! If you're feeling grateful, you're also practising mindfulness, because you can't feel gratitude without first bringing your attention to what you're experiencing.

Positive psychology researchers tell us that being 'grateful' on a regular basis has a significant impact on our wellbeing. Grateful people have better immune systems, are more optimistic, deal with adversity better, are more generous and forgiving, feel less isolated, and are generally just more happy!

An easy way to start being more grateful is to take time at the beginning of the day when you first wake, and the end of the day when your head hits the pillow, to consciously think of 3 things you are grateful for, no matter how small.

You can find the desktop wallpaper below featured among other lovely wallpapers here. Download the wallpaper size to use on your computer by clicking on the image below.

Cultivate an Attitude of Gratitude. Desktop wallpaper to download for free. Circle of Daydreams. www.circleofdaydreams.com

The Most Crucial Pieces of The Puzzle (for me):

Let's take a look at the other crucial pieces of the puzzle... the ones we neglect at our own peril. I'm really good at neglecting some of these (especially sleep), and when I do it always comes back to bite me in the bum.

 

SLEEP:

If I burn the candle at both ends, I find myself lacking in clear thought, unable to focus properly, more likely to make mistakes, and less likely to be able to be creative! Sleep gives me time to mull over ideas and process things, as well as time for my body to heal and balance itself out. I think we all neglect sleep at our own peril.

I'm actually at the peri-menopause stage and sleep is a hard thing to snag some nights, and the day after a 'poor sleep' night is always tricky for me.

Here's a lovely page (it's actually a site for selling blinds believe it or not!) about all manner of ideas and tips for sleep, and a sleep calculator. Pretty cool actually.

The app called Noisli is something I use often. You can mix and match your own soundtrack of background noises and sounds to provide a soothing all night soundtrack to your sleep. The app promotes itself as a productivity booster, but for me, its best use is as a sleep aide! I just sit my iPad beside the bed all night, and away I go!

 

STILLNESS AND SOLITUDE:

I'm not the best at meditation (yet!), but I do love listening to meditative audios. Taking time to myself to just be, is so important. It's a way to retreat, regenerate, and renew my spirit and my energy. Even just 10 minutes sitting in nature, day dreaming, or focusing on my breathing provides such relief and refreshes my mind ready for whatever is next!

A special place I've discovered, with stacks of meditations to listen to for free, is Audio Dharma. The talks, downloads and meditations are centred around the teaching of Buddha and Buddhism. I've been interested in Buddhism for a long time, and find myself drifting closer towards its teachings as time goes on. Even if you're not interested in it at all though, this site is a huge sanctuary with resources to soothe and calm.

Also, Radio Magico has some wonderful meditation audios and info. You have to check this site out. It's terrific (I mention it again below!)

And, last but not least, Jack Kornfield's site has some amazing meditations you can begin to experiment with and use daily. These are written mantras and meditations. You can also shop for beautiful books and audios.

 

NOURISHING FOOD:

I suffer from chronic fatigue, and have to be very careful with my diet as a part of my maintenance plan. I try really hard to include lots of green vegetables, other vegies, simple proteins, the grains my stomach can get by on, and other simple unprocessed foods. I really know it if I eat too much junk food over too many days!

I really do believe in that old adage 'You are what you eat'. Or put another way 'You get out what you put in'. If you want a quality life, then you need to fuel yourself with quality food.

 

MOVEMENT:

Movement (or exercise to put it more bluntly!) gives you a rush of feel good endorphins, creates mental space, and gives your body the chance to maintain flexibility, fitness, and strength.

Numerous studies have shown how beneficial it is to mental and physical health. It helps keep depression and anxiety low, and can add years to your life!! Why wouldn't you? I get most of mine from dancing, some walking and orienteering... doing things I love always motivates me to get going.

Alexandra Franzen agrees... When you 'don't have time' is when you need it most of all.

 

CONNECTING:

I'm an introvert, and I love my own space and time to decompress. Being in a room with lots of people can drain my energy big time, but catching up with a small group of friends is like gold. I make regular time to nourish my friendships and family connections because even though I'm a bit of a loner, I still need those connections.

As humans, we're wired to be social (so I seem to read everywhere), and especially as we get older, I think, they remain crucial to our mental and emotional well being.

Friends to share a laugh with, offer a shoulder to cry on, be there through thick and thin.... these are the things I value, and they do too!

 

SPARKING JOY:

As I've mentioned before, I think we all need to make time for moments and activities that bring us joy. I believe they're vital to anyone's best life. And, as YOU matter, you need and deserve these things.

Something that sparks joy for me is music! I couldn't live without it. If you're looking for some wonderful background music to stream whenever you work, try this site and click on the Radio Magico box. Music 24/7 whenever you want!

You can also download the app for free.

The music ranges from zen, to dance, to relaxation.

Amazing sounds!


“Self care is not selfish or self indulgent. We cannot nurture others from a dry well. We need to take care of our own needs first, then we can give from our surplus, our abundance. ”
(Jennifer Louden)

Today's Take-aways:

  • Taking care of yourself first is not selfish.
  • Everyone benefits when we nurture ourselves.
  • Focus on the fundamentals.
  • Use resources to support and help your self care.
  • Be kind to yourself, and pamper yourself!

Top Resources To Use:

I look forward to seeing you for the final 'YOU Matter' in our next installment! 

Linda. xox


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Thoughtful Way-finding + The Garden of Gratitude...


Once or twice a month, I send out small yet mighty notes of encouragement and support. These emails include way-finding directions, cheer-leading, and ideas to make your journey better one step, one fork in the road, and one magical moment at a time. Free access to The Garden of Gratitude is also yours as soon as you subscribe.

CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE



23 Important Things I Wish I'd Fully Understood Before I Was 23...

23 Important Things I Wish I'd Fully Understood Before I Was 23

1. Some people will like me, some people will love me. Some people won't do either. What's most important is I love, and like myself. To that end, I need to be the best person I can be - for me.

2. Truly listening is a skill that rewards me in spades.

3. Bad things happen to good people, and good things happen to bad people. Life can be heart wrenching and unfair for no good reason. Some things just are. It's not what happens, it's how I react to it.

4. Saying 'no' should not be a precursor to guilt. 'No' can be a sentence in itself, and doesn't require detailed explanations all the time. People pleasing is not a great career option.

5. Shame can suffocate your essence and snuff out your spark. Putting effort into sharing your shame and dealing with it will help lift the burden. Being proactive and calling out your shame is scary, but worth it.

Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we are capable of change. Brene Brown. Circle of Daydreams. www.circleofdaydreams.com

6. The direction I take is mine to choose. Ideas and tips from others are great, but ultimately I steer my own ship. Any decisions I make are mine, and the consequences that flow from them are mine. Playing the victim only gives away my power. Negativity thwarts pathways for growth.

7. Everyone sees the world through their own filter. If I disagree with them, I remind myself there may be solid reasons why they think like they do. We all come at life from our own perspectives, and the only person who's lived my life is me (and they theirs).

8. I need time alone to recharge and renew myself. This is okay. Others don't need to understand this, or even accept it. It is what it is, and my mindset and health are much better when I include it.

9. Being weird, dorky, or a little off the beaten track is also okay. Besides, the beaten path is well mined... stepping away means I sometimes find a diamond in the rough!

10. Sleep is one of my best friends, and my whole life is better when I treat it as such.

11. Treating my body like a temple means everything else in life improves. But it's okay to treat my body like a fun-house now and then too!

12. Laughter really is the best medicine (along with animals, dancing, singing, art, friends, family, nature, and time).

13. Talking to myself isn't an indicator of madness, it helps me process my feelings and get a handle on things. After all, I think I'm reasonably intelligent, so I'm a good person to have a chat with! Rehearsing future conversations in the shower is also fruitful!

14. Feelings will not kill you. They can also come in cycles. Stuffing them down or bottling them up builds resentment and stunts progress. Best to feel them, let them flow through me, and know life will happen despite them.

15. Keeping my surroundings uncluttered and my cupboards with room to spare feels luxurious and free. My mind is clearer, I feel better, and I'm calmer when I pay attention to the way I create my home and work space. My home is a haven, and a sanctuary for my soul. Putting effort into keeping it that way is therapeutic and brings me joy.

16. Boundaries are a vital part of protecting my inner core and well-being. Respecting myself enough to call out the disrespect of others and walk away from it honours who I am. Being alone is infinitely better than being with someone who treats me poorly.

Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves, even when we risk disappointing others. Brene Brown. Circle of Daydreams. www.circleofdaydreams.com

17. Letting go when I can't change things, and having the courage to change the things I can, is one of the best pathways to satisfaction and contentment.

You can only lose what you cling to. Buddha. Circle of Daydreams. www.circleofdaydreams.com

18. My intuition and gut feelings are superb indicators of what's real.

19. I should never make a life changing decision while I'm in an extreme mindset or mood. For example: Furious, devastated, ravenous, sleep deprived, shocked, or surprised. This almost always ends with poorly judged outcomes. Although, sometimes I'm in luck and things work out anyway!

20. Invisible threads are the strongest ties. Sometimes there are things driving me I'm not wholly aware of. And sometimes, there are habits or relationships I continue on auto pilot. Breaking detrimental attachments, particularly those I'm not wholly aware of, is something that requires great effort, and sometimes third party support. (I love a good counseling session).

Today, love yourself enough to say goodbye to those things that don't know how to love you back. Alessandra Sagredo. Circle of Daydreams. www.circleofdaydreams.com

21. If I'm trying to play perfectly, then I'm not 'playing' I'm performing. (Unless I'm on stage - that's a playground for me!) If I'm trying to play without leaving any room for mistakes, tangents, or creative muck ups.... then I'm putting on a 'performance' rather than letting loose. Perfectionism can cripple joy.

22. The only person I can control is myself. The only person who can truly make me happy, is me. I am in charge of my own life, and it's not my right to control others. Trying to fix or rescue someone else from their own self destruction is also a form of control. We are all our own entities. Help and advice is nice, as long as it is freely given, and the giver is okay with it being rejected (me included)!

23. I am enough.


23 is almost half of 51, and I'd like to think I learned these things evenly across my time, one every couple of years. But, no.... there seems to have been a snowball effect as I got closer to 40, and then things really started to gather speed and cement themselves as I got to 50.

I'm never going to be perfect, and I'm still going to make many a mistake. The things I've learned may be forgotten and have to be re-learned via a new lesson! But, as long as I approach life with an attitude of gratitude and a willingness to learn, I trust myself to be the best 'me' I can be.

I wonder what lessons I'll be able to look back on in another 10 years or so?!

What about you?

What are the most important things you've learned over time?

(I've added this post to Open Slather on Alicia's wonderful blog!)

Linda. xox

You can download the quotes used in this post right here (no strings).




Please share!






Thoughtful Way-finding + The Garden of Gratitude...


Once or twice a month, I send out small yet mighty notes of encouragement and support. These emails include way-finding directions, cheer-leading, and ideas to make your journey better one step, one fork in the road, and one magical moment at a time. Free access to The Garden of Gratitude is also yours as soon as you subscribe.

CLICK HERE TO LEARN MORE